Friday, July 6, 2012

Missed Connection

I've always wondered if someone would ever have THAT much of an interest in me, 
to make a missed connections ad on craigslist.

Not that I've ever even looked at them,
but I think I'd feel pretty dang special.
Wouldn't you?

Years ago I was dating this guy,
he was amazing.
I loved him more than I thought possible.
But I messed things up.

Even though I'm not proud of it,
or particularly happy.
I wouldn't have Dustin or my angel baby had it not happened.

Sometimes I still miss him.
We had a rough breakup.
The day we broke up, 
he deleted me from his life.
I haven't heard from him again.

It's been two and a half years.
I still creep his facebook sometimes.
I still have his number.

But I don't try.
Because I am happy where I am.

But if for some reason he sees this,
I just wanted him to know I'm sorry.
I messed up, and I know it.
And sometimes it still breaks my heart to know I hurt him.

But I love my life now.
And it just so happens that he isn't a part of it.

The truth hurts.
I'm sorry CRS.
From the bottom of my heart.


Cat said...

Beautiful post

jes @ twosmuppies said...

my ex of 5 years and i were best friends for 5 years before we started dating. we broke up. and we haven't spoken to each other since. and it's been almost two and a half years. i know it was my fault for not caring more when we were in the relationship. so i resonate with this post.

but life is so much better leaving behind what really is the past.